Category: Poetry

I insist on building cities in my mind
My only material: time
Mark the spot that I found
With a hole in the ground
In a place only I can find

On shaky foundations I raise intricate walls
Filled with empty rooms and dead-end halls
Find a handsome door to stop and stand
And fumble with a pile of keys in my hand
Match the key to the lock by the pattern of rust
Twist, turn and open, greet a buttress of dust

Make plans for the future
Put signs over the door
Spin scandalous schemes
And map out the floor
Furnish with fancies
Snatched out of their soar

Conceive a daydream in a lusty embrace
Impregnate a whim and abandon the place
Lock it up tight, move onto the next
Until the rooms are full of discarded rejects

Cross the street to a greener plot
Build again upon an empty lot
Over and over, as the city spreads wide
Filled with the ghosts of promising lies

Pull and slide
Tie and strap
Tighten pads
Fasten cap.

Shade my eyes
Check the road
Stand and rise
Push off slow.

Press the left,
Heave on right,
Crouch, determined
I set my sight

Upon my way,
The way I go.
Avoid the crowd
To favor the flow.

Whir of friction
Beneath my feet,
Slide and cut,
Cross the street.

Taking flight
By twitch of limb,
Wrapped in space
Through air I swim.

Heart quickens.
Brow drips.
Breath thickens.
Flesh rips.

Here I am real,
Not in the past.
Made to feel,
Not made to last.

Dodge and crash
Through mud and rain.
Earn my scars.
Become my pain.

The breeze is warm
But my shell is damp.
Break into the open,
Coast off-ramp.

The world laid before me
Sky lit on fire,
I add my soul
To this heavenly pyre!

The torch is doused
in a sea of stars.
The dark rolls over
Near becomes far.

I slow to rest
But my spirit still flies.
I snatch my heart
And hold it inside.

Remove my gear.
Heap in a pile.
Close my eyes.
Breathe, and smile.

I offer my blood
In a prayer of sweat,
To imbibe my pain.
May the gods repent!

From July, 2019…

Crawl out of my skin
Creep down the curb
Slide into the gutter
Sink out of the world

Grasp at my face
Clench my eyes
Crush my heart
Curse at the sky

Back into the shadows
Away from the light
Fall into the realm
Of perpetual night

On mud and rock
Wet and cold
Dripping echoes
Crouch and fold

Fool! You’re not alone
You cannot flee
You tried to hide
But they followed thee

They sneak up the walls
Stretch, reach my ear
They snarl and snivel
Spittle and sneer

They spit and sweat
And bleed and cry
It’s getting too deep
It’s getting too high

It flows down my throat
Backs into my sinus
Pours out my nostrils
As I drown in detritus

The pressure rises
Something gives way
Flushed out of the dark
Into the light of day

I retch and heave
Drip and dry
Rise from my knees
Squint at the sky

I lumber to return
To my abandoned flesh
I put it back on
But it has to stretch

They stalk me still
They’ll come for me forever
I’ll never be ready
I can only surrender

From January, 2019…

The water is dark
I’m sinking fast
I do not think that my lungs can last.

I’ve been out here forever
Alone in the sea
When I fell off the boat
No man noticed me.

The boat kept going
As boats are want to do
Because the crew can’t afford to turn back for you.

Now the lead in my chest is weighing me down.
I cannot break the surface
I’m going to drown.

Emptiness above
Emptiness below
I have no choice
Down I go.

My fire’s gone cold
The light grows dim
Alone in the sea
I pray, on a whim.

Once more I look
I search the sky
Is anything there?
On watch, up high?

Then I spot, in the dark
A single bright star
It lights up the night
Like a fire from afar.

I take one last breath
I burst above the waves
With what’s left of my strength
I strain, focus my gaze.

The last thing I see upon that dark northern sky
Is that lone star silhouetting an island but nigh.

But then my arms went limp
And my eyes rolled back
My body stopped fighting
And the world turned black.

I awoke on a beach as the night was fading
Pulled myself to my feet though my body was aching

The island seemed small
But it’s forest was dense.
Spotting a path through the wood
I made my way hence.

A narrow path well tread
But at the edges, overgrown.
Lined with ancient trees and walls of crumbling stone.

I came upon a clearing off the path through the wood.
In the middle, by fire, a single man stood.

I approached and was struck.
Wait? How could this be?
This lonely old man bears resemblance to me

“Welcome, my son”
I said, “you’re not my father”
“I am the father of all of your fathers

“You found me on the brink of your imminent death
Conjured by you with your very last breath

“You sought, at the end, the last speck of light
Then you found it, now you’re here, you made it through the night.

“You’re not the first and you’re not the last
To fall off the boat and drift, offcast.

“Many drown
Most are devoured
Few wash ashore their penultimate hour
To seek the light
Walk the old road
Squelch desire for the conventional mode.

—

“As the warmth of my fire restores color to your face
Your time has come to leave this place.
Linger longer and you will burn
So to the sea you must return.”

He led me down and around through the rock
Stopped and pointed to a long narrow dock.

A small boat was moored there
Floating serenely
He then spun me around and addressed me keenly,

“It is time for you to return to the sea.
Know that once you’ve found the light
You can always find me

“This boat will take you where you need to go
But seek out others
Don’t float alone.

“At the end of your journey
When you’ve reached your beach
The story of my light in the dark you must teach

“So that they can find me,
Just like you
Repeat the cycle,
rescue, renew.”

From August, 2016…

Lost Sons of the Father,
Why have you left?
My House is nearly empty.
It lies dark, cold, and unkempt.

You left all of your armor.
It collects dust on the wall.
Without it’s sturdy protection,
You cannot stand, and will fall.

The World, it has weapons
That you dare not dismiss.
If you refuse your defense
You’ll be forced to submit.

—

Your Hearth was deserted,
Flame withered to smolder.
The pantry was empty
A cold hunger took over.

So to you I wouldn’t listen,
Your warnings went unheeded.
Your frigid, barren, drafty House
Did not have what I’d needed.

I wandered then away
Through the fog in the night.
I’d lost the way to your House, Father,
As the space dimmed the light.

But the Glow of the Tower!
I can see from afar.
It cuts through the haze,
A replica star.

This Glow from the Tower
Leaks from every dark corner.
It pulses, surrounds me
Blankets me over.

The laws of your Fire,
This light does not obey.
The warmth your Fire gives me,
This takes it away.

The heat from your Hearth
is given up for the Glow.
But the cold doesn’t matter,
I just want the show.

Show me more! I demand,
There is always more to see.
The icy vacuum inside of me,
it shivers, quivers, needs

A warmth that isn’t here,
A fire I cannot find
In the Tower where I seek.
It’s in the House I left behind.

—

Now the house is abandoned,
A grimalkin guards the door.
She welcomes dark strangers
With a purr, not a roar.

Sons, my walls, they are crumbling,
The locks have all been broken.
The Fires are not lit,
It’s past time that we’d spoken.

The Steward has failed.
He’s muddied my word.
My commands have been mocked,
My lines have been blurred.

Too weak to stoke the Fires,
Too old to feed your soul.
I need new men to return
To reclaim this sacred role.

My House is in peril,
Sweat drips down my brow.
The hordes, they are coming
I can’t stop them now.

Please, come back and fight,
You must rescue your home,
Evil must be defeated,
And crushed down below.

—

Alone, I am, Father,
I’m now hollow and weak.
But now I’ve heard your voice
I know of what you speak.

Evil’s always covered
The earth in sin.
But it’s invaded our house.
And we let it in.

It crept into the Word,
Through the Word it was sown.
Replacing Fire above,
With Fire below

I must relearn your Word
To rekindle my Flame
I’ll crawl down from the Tower
And I’ll spread your good name.

—

It’s up to us now,
Lost Sons of the Father,
We must relight the Fire
And make it burn hotter.

Great evil is coming,
It will not cease.
You must take up arms,
There will be no peace.

I’ll summon an army,
We’ll flock to his banner,
Any attempt by the World
To interfere, won’t matter.

For our will is strong
And our cause is just.
Our Fires burn hot.
We will win. We must.

This is not the beginning,
This is not the end,
This is a war for your soul,
And the future, my friend.

Come, fight with me, brother!
Bring your sword, grab your shield.
We’ll meet demons in battle,
and face death on the field.

When we reclaim his House,
We’ll relight the Fire.
We’ll restore its old glory,
Divinely inspired.

Rise, Honor your Father
And the men who came before,
To the builders, the Martyrs,
The fighters, and the Lord.

Oh, Sons of the Father
Led astray by the Glow,
Come back to the Fire,
Return to your Home.

From August, 2016…

The word lights the fire that forges the sword.
Your will is the hammer.
Your blood fills the mold.
Your life is a battle,
Outcome foretold.

It speaks through your eyes, it’s written in your blade.
Your fate relies on the weapon you’ve made.

If you find your soul lacking desire,
Take your weapon back to the fire.

Smite that old sword, throw it into the gorge.
Pull down the word and relight the forge.

When your molten soul cools and hardens once more,
Raise high your new blade and charge to the fore.

You will fall in battle
Your story will be heard
Your myth becomes legend
The legend is the word.